Cat Clips Contest--Win a Car!

To celebrate the 60th episode of "Cat Clips," I'm holding a little contest for my YouTube subscribers that you are more than welcome to join in on. (You just have to be a member of YouTube--which is free to join and only takes a minute to sign up.) To participate, simply click on the photo above to watch the video and answer the three questions asked during the video. The prizes are explained at the end. Good luck!

CONTEST RULES AND GUIDELINES

1. Must be a subscriber to ScoobyHubby--which is my YouTube screen name. (Again, you can do this by joining YouTube, which only takes a minute.)

2. Watch the video and answer the three questions. (Hint: There are no wrong answers.)

3. Ideas and clues can be found throughout the 50 different "Cat Clips" currently available on YouTube. (But creativity and originality are important.)

4. Leave your answer as either a text comment below the video on YouTube, or as a video response--Again, the more creative, the better.

5. The deadline for entry is May 31, 2009 and you may enter as many times as you like.

Hope to see some bloggers joining in on the fun. After all, there's cash and a car to win!!!!

Musical Mockery #2--My Comcast Bill

My friend Michael is at it again with another Musical Mockery. This time his target is Comcast. After recently switching to Comcast's Triple Play option, he received a horrendous bill. And because Comcast was less than responsive to his complaints, he decided to write this little song to parody his experience. To watch the short video, please click on the photo above.

Flipping and Folding is Fun for Lazy Launderer

One of my least favorite activities in the world is to do my own laundry. I never seem to have the time or desire to actually perform this domestic ritual, even though I have a perfectly functioning washer and dryer in my basement. And though I’m embarrassed to admit it, there have been times when my laundry basket has not only overflowed, but actually leaped into the rest of the room, forming one of those large monolithic mounds like Richard Dreyfus made in “Close Encounters of the Third Kind.” And only when the mountain became so large that I could actually ski from the top to the bottom would I finally stuff it all into my two colorful laundry bags and cart them down to the local laundry mat, where they charged $.90 a pound to wash it for me.

I know, I know. One of the biggest time and money wasters ever…not to mention a clear indication of how lazy I can be when it comes to carrying out normal household tasks. (Did I mention I have a maid who comes in twice a month as well? But that’s a different story.)

Anyway, once the economy started going into freefall last year, I had to make some big sacrifices when it came to unnecessary expenditures. Naturally, one of the first things to go was my semi-quarterly trip to the laundry mat and all those embarrassing conversations I would have with the elderly lady who washed my clothing. Because even though she was very sweet and looked a little like Aunt Bee from Mayberry, I always had the feeling she was laughing about something. I wasn’t sure if it was my taste in clothing, or the colorful Ginch Gonch underwear I had in my collection, or just the fact that I only brought my laundry in when it weighed more than a Sumu wrestler. But there was definitely something that made her smile every time she’d see me. Well, smile and also groan a little.

But now that I do my laundry at home, I no longer see Aunt Bee. And for a while there, people probably couldn’t tell the difference between my dirty laundry and my clean clothing, as the inclusion of folds and wrinkles were evident in both. What can I say? I hated folding laundry. And sometimes I’d let the laundry sit in the dryer for so many days before folding it, my shirts started looking like crepe paper. For Halloween, I even draped myself with some of my dirty clothes and went as a laundry basket. Everyone thought I was so clever, but I really had nothing else to wear.

My life and demeanor were slowly becoming more and more Neanderthal, all because I didn’t have the time or patience to do my laundry properly. That is, until one day I was surfing the web, and happened upon this new miracle item known as a Flip-and-Fold. It’s a very simple and ingenious contraption that allows you to fold all your shirts to the exact same size…every single time. No more guessing which sleeve to tuck or crease to fold. It’s all done for you with a few simple flips and folds. And what’s more, it’s actually fun.

Once I got this product and actually began using it, my laundry was not such a pain any more. And sometimes, I actually looked forward to doing it. Why? Because when you have something that allows you to easily fold and organize your clothes in a civil manner, it gives you a sense of pride in your work and your appearance. No longer am I subject to t-shirts that look like dirty napkins, or pullovers that look like I slept in them. Now all my clothing comes out perfectly folded and stacked and ready for wearing.

In fact, I was so impressed with the Flip and Fold that I actually bought everyone in my family one of their very own for Christmas this past year. And not only do they all use it, but every single one of them has thanked me heartily for the ingenious device. One of my nephews even likes it so much, he now helps his mom with the laundry every week. Talk about a miracle!

But that’s just me. Do you have any contraptions that help make your laundry experience easier?

Musical Mockery #1--One Percent

Did you know that 80% of the world's wealth is owned by only 1% of the world's population?

That is the inspiration for this video I helped make with my friend Michael, which offers a very "futuristic" solution to the current economic crisis. Here's the description: "On the evening before the Great Revolt of 2009, the Leader of the Rebel Faction transmits a special message to the struggling masses to prepare them for the upcoming battle against "the wealthy one percent of the world." To watch the short video, please click on the photo above.

Because of the Village People, YouTube Rejected Me as a Partner

Please forgive me if I rant a little today, but I am a tad perturbed. As you may know, I am quite an avid YouTube uploader…using the website to “virtually” house all my video epics so I don’t have to pay for a real server to store them. And over the course of the past year, I have slowly built up a nice following of viewers and fans, many of whom encouraged me to become a YouTube Partner (an honor that apparently comes with a few perks, including actual payments for advertising on your videos.) As I’d always assumed a YouTube Partner needed thousands of subscribers in order to be considered, I hadn’t thought it was time yet for me to pursue such a relationship. (At this point in time, I have 356 subsribers and 97 friends.)

But then several viewers of mine (who were already Partners) told me that was not the case, and because I was consistently getting high ratings, comments and views for my videos, I would probably be considered as a good prospect. So without thinking much about it, I filled out the short form online and submitted it to YouTube. I figured I probably wouldn’t hear anything for a few weeks or so, as I’m sure there were literally thousands of people at any given time trying to become a Partner as well.

Imagine my surprise when I woke up the next morning to find a response. Only it wasn’t really the kind of response I expected. To follow is the very cold form letter I received:

Dear ScoobyHubby, (This is my UserName on YouTube)

Thank you for your interest in the YouTube Partner Program. Our goal is to extend invitations to as many partners as we can. Unfortunately we are unable to accept your application at this time. The partner program is designed for users whose videos consistently comply with the YouTube Community Guidelines and Terms of Use. At this time, your account history indicates that it has not always fully complied with the rules that govern our site.

Applications are reviewed for a variety of criteria, including but not limited to the size of your audience, country of residence, quality of content, and consistency with our Community Guidelines and Terms of Use. Please review the program qualifications (http://www.youtube.com/partners) for a complete list of our criteria.As we continue to expand we hope to be able to accept a broader group of partners. We have registered your interest in the program and will continue to monitor your account for potential future acceptance into the program.

Thank you for your understanding.

Now you may wonder what they are referring to when they say I have “not always fully complied with the rules that govern our site”. The only time I ever had an issue with YouTube was when I uploaded a video that was a parody of the Village People song “YMCA,” in which I hummed a sixty second version of the tune while little animated rubber ducks performed a rousing dance number. (See photo above) In the video, I didn’t sing any of the lyrics or even play the real music…I just hummed it. Several days after I uploaded it, I received a very nasty e-mail from YouTube saying that “SCORPIO MUSIC S.A. / CAN’T STOP PRODUCTIONS INC.” (the company that owns the rights to YMCA) had the video taken down because of copyright infringement. (This entire incident is fully detailed in my blog posting, “I Survived a YouTube Banning”)

So because of one little infraction back in August, I've now been flagged “unacceptable” as a YouTube Partner. And I know that nobody bothered to even review my current content or the popularity of my videos because I got a response in under twenty-four hours. And you will notice, the e-mail wasn’t even signed by anyone, as if YouTube is some sort of higher power that doesn’t need accountability.

After receiving the rejection e-mail, I admit that I got a little depressed. Not because I wasn’t accepted right away, but because of WHY I wasn’t accepted. And now all I can do is blame the Village People and their stupid song for getting me into this mess in the first place. Had I not wanted to pay tribute to that famous dance anthem, I might actually have a shot at earning a few extra dollars a month.

But that’s just me. What do you blame the Village People for?

The Procrastination Against Picking up Pennies

Have you ever noticed a penny lying on the floor and not bothered to pick it up? Even though the old adage says “Find a penny, Pick it up, All day long you’ll have good luck.” And yet you inherently know that a penny isn’t worth that much, so you pass it by without a second thought. In fact, if someone ever said to you “A penny for your thoughts,” you would probably insist on getting at least a dollar before you responded. (Am I right?)

Even when a penny falls out of your pocket, you never bother to pick it up. You just leave it wherever it lands. Over by the bookcase, next to the bathtub, caught between the floorboards. You see them all the time, lying in their place, waiting to be picked up. You mean to pick them up. You tell yourself to pick them up. But you don’t. They’re just not worth enough to you. So you leave them lying there. Alone, abandoned, gathering dust. Is this just a case of laziness on your part, or do you perhaps have a serious issue with anti-penny-ism?

All kidding aside, what if this act of defiance against copper currency actually represented a much bigger problem? What if ignoring the penny is really our way of procrastinating against something we don’t want to deal with? As if it’s showing us that we aren’t attentive to the little things. I mean, if we can’t even bend down to pick up a penny off the floor, what does that say about the other little “issues” in our life that we’re ignoring?

So the pennies start to pile up. They become a sort of physical manifestation of our chaotic state of mind. The more pennies we see, the more we probably need to resolve some kind of conflict in our life. And until we confront the problem, there will always be pennies lying around to remind us. That’s why it’s so hard to pick them up. It means facing our demons.

Anyway, it’s just a theory. It probably doesn’t work with dimes or quarters, though. And definitely not with Susan B. Anthony dollars.

My Vet is Killing Me!

When did the cost of taking care of an animal exceed the cost of taking care of yourself? Recently I’ve taken my cat Chase on a series of unfortunate visits to the local Animal Hospital. I say unfortunate, because I’ve spent more for Chase’s healthcare over the last six months than I have for myself over the last ten years. It’s unfathomable that a little cat could require so many tests and shots and examinations that an average visit costs between $600 and $900. For a cat! I can go to a regular doctor and pay less. (Unfortunately, my healthcare plan doesn’t consider Chase a "significant other.")

And because Chase was recently diagnosed with diabetes, I now have to give him two shots of insulin a day. Plus, all the ongoing tests he must get, the special food he has to eat, the other medicines he must take. It’s like I’m caring for an invalid parent. And while I’m very sympathetic to his situation and needs, the cost of keeping him healthy is going to put me in the poorhouse.

And diabetes isn’t the first major issue I’ve had with Chase either. I once spent over two thousand dollars for a series of tests that ultimately determined the reason for Chase’s sickly demeanor was because he had a mild case of gas. What? You couldn’t just look at him and tell me that? You had to run his blood work so many times I needed to take out a small loan just to pay for the results?

I remember when going to the vet meant a quick check-up, maybe a blood test or two, and then a nominal fee for the whole visit. You didn’t pay a Vet as much as a regular doctor because you weren’t dealing with humans, you were dealing with animals. But now the Vet has assumed a different status; a snotty sort of superiority that makes you feel guilty if you don’t want to pay for that extra urine analysis or a dissection of his stool sample. Not to mention the ridiculously high fees they charge for “waste disposal.” (How can anyone justify $7.50 for waste removal? You throw something in the trash can and you’re done. For that, you get $7.50? I should be so lucky.)

I also have a sneaking suspicion the receptionists in a Vet’s office get a sadistic pleasure when they tell you the price you'll have to pay for the visit.

“And the total for today's exam is…,” they say, inserting a huge pause before dropping the bombshell. “Ten thousand, four hundred dollars and twenty three cents.”

It’s like they get some kind of high every time they get to deliver the bad news. And if people freak out, so much the better. On one visit, I actually witnessed someone faint in front of me when the receptionist gave her the total. And after they carried the poor woman out of the reception area, I believe they added on a fee for “waste removal” as well.

So I guess the question becomes, when does your pet become more of a liability than a pleasure?